“The Late Life Lesbian Diaries, pt. 4”

It’s been awhile since we caught up with “The Late Life Lesbian Diaries,” so here is part four of this feature written by RM, a later-in-life lesbian embarking on a new, long-distance relationship. To catch up, here is part one, part two, and part three.


Part Four

Ten facts about BG, one is a lie. This is the list I start my day with, my quest is to figure out which one is not true. I had plans to leave the apartment for some spontaneous exploration, but it was Sunday and I was in no hurry. I knew she played golf, so that one is true. I really hope her favorite season being autumn is true, yet another beautiful match of the little things we love. A woman who has recently discovered her gayness can probably fix most things around the house. I’ll call that true. Still in bed, I  snap a pic and send it to answer her asking if I had left on my explorations yet. Why I use this tool of sexuality so readily, I’m not sure. The list of ten and the get to know you questions warm my heart and creates an intimacy that has nothing to do with sex. Yet, here I am showing my sensual side, redirecting her, and the conversation. Again. I send a message apologizing, in my light-hearted way and then one message in return awakens every nerve in my body.

“Actually, I wanted to ask you something…My family is going away for 8 days in late September and I will be here all by myself. Is there any chance you could come and visit?”

Continue reading ““The Late Life Lesbian Diaries, pt. 4””

Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories #11

Here is the next article in our series where we share our stories gathered from the online support group for women coming out later in life. For more information on this support group and how to request to join, go here. You can find the earlier posts and topics in this series here.

 

STAYING WITH YOUR HUSBAND, Part 3

by Laurel Peterson

This month we’re discussing different topics related to late life lesbians who choose to stay married to their straight husbands, either temporarily or permanently. This week, we’re discussing the very sensitive topic of affairs. This week’s question is:

 

If you had a lesbian affair while you were still married to a man, how did that come about and how (if at all) did it end?

Continue reading “Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories #11”

Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories #10

Here is the next article in our series where we share our stories gathered from the online support group for women coming out later in life. For more information on this support group and how to request to join, go here. You can find the earlier posts and topics in this series here.

STAYING WITH YOUR HUSBAND/PARTNER (Part 2)

by Laurel Peterson
This month we’re discussing different topics related to late life lesbians who choose to stay married to their straight husbands, either temporarily or permanently. This week we’re discussing how these marital relationships fare once the woman realizes and accepts that she isn’t straight. Our question is:

If you stayed in your straight marriage after realizing your sexuality, in what ways did your marriage/relationship to your husband change?

Continue reading “Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories #10”

Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories #9

Here is the next article in our series where we share our stories gathered from the online support group for women coming out later in life. For more information on this support group and how to request to join, go here. You can find the earlier posts and topics in this series here.

STAYING WITH YOUR HUSBAND/PARTNER (Part 1)

by Laurel Peterson

The last several weeks, we talked about the difficulty of coming out to your straight partner. Now we’re moving on to the next step – once you have come out to your husband/boyfriend, your relationship doesn’t magically disappear. The next couple of weeks, we’ll explore the ways in which the late life lesbians in our group tried to make things work with their partners. This week’s question is:

If you chose to stay with your husband/partner after realizing you had a same sex attraction and telling him about it, why did you do so? How long did you stay together?

Continue reading “Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories #9”

Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories, #8

Here is the next article in our series where we share our stories gathered from the online support group for women coming out later in life. For more information on this support group and how to request to join, go here. You can find the earlier posts and topics in this series here.

COMING OUT TO YOUR STRAIGHT SPOUSE/PARTNER (Part 4)

by Laurel Peterson

Now that we’ve covered the things that we wish our straight partners understood about our experience as late life lesbians, this week it’s time to get down to the big question – is it possible to stay together once you’ve had a realization about your sexuality? This week’s question was:

How did you and/or your straight partner decide whether to stay together or split immediately in light of your attraction to women?

Continue reading “Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories, #8”

Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories, #7

Here is the next article in our series where we share our stories gathered from the online support group for women coming out later in life. For more information on this support group and how to request to join, go here. You can find the earlier posts and topics in this series here.

COMING OUT TO YOUR STRAIGHT SPOUSE/PARTNER (Part 3)

by Laurel Peterson

Last week, we discussed how our relationships with boyfriends, husbands, or ex-husbands had changed in light of knowledge about our same sex attraction. This week, we’re digging deeper into the complications that arise for our straight spouses/partners who are trying to understand us. This week’s question was:

What do you wish your current/former straight partner would or could understand about you being attracted to women?

Continue reading “Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories, #7”

Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories, #6

Here is the next part in our series where we share our stories gathered from the online support group for women coming out later in life. For more information on this support group and how to request to join, go here. You can find the other posts and topics in this series here.

COMING OUT TO YOUR STRAIGHT SPOUSE/PARTNER, Part 2

by Laurel Peterson

This month we’re focusing on relationships many of our 600 plus members have or had with the men in their life. Last week, we discussed the different ways we as late life lesbians came out to our husbands or boyfriends, and also discussed why not telling them was sometimes the choice we made. This week, we’re taking a closer look at how revelations about our sexuality have affected how we relate to these men on a longer term basis. This week’s question was:

How has your relationship with your husband/boyfriend changed or evolved since coming out to him?

Continue reading “Late Life Lesbians: Our Stories, #6”